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corvi
corivax
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hawaii, again

Hawaii is what you'd get if some far-future historian read a bunch of livejournal posts written by Americans and decided to try and reconstruct this "America" place. He gets the general shapes of things right, but the details are very wrong. Right melody, wrong words.

Take policemen. Our historian knows about policemen; he saw an old documentary on China once. So when he puts policemen in his slice of America, they're the sort that wear white gloves and blow incessantly on whistles.

He fares a lot better with that strange thing called "diners". He knows they server combination plates! He can do that: spam and teriyaki fried chicken is a combination plate, right? Also pies- dobash (chocolatey thing) and haupia (coconut custard). He knows there's a side dish that comes with every single meal, but nobody actually explains what "fries" are, so in his reconstructed Americana, all the diners and fast food joints offer rice instead.

His "chips" are shrimp flavored, and he knows that there are stores selling sweet tasting "candy" to eager children, but not that "candy" isn't pickled mango with preserved plum powder (bless his ill-informed soul; that stuff is great). Birds are particularly troublesome. He reads that all the city streets are beset by 'pigeons' and 'sparrows' who travel in huge flocks and defecate on statuary, and he picks out some likely species from a genetic bank: spotted dove, zebra dove, java sparrow.




And yet, somehow every time I come back to this place, it seems a little more like home.

Comments

i, for instance, always typo "monkey" in place of "money" :)

if I could find a job there... those are some great pictures. They have seriously weird birds.

I'd be shocked if you couldn't find a job here, but the connections to find the relevant jobs are non-trivial at times. There's an organization that does a lot of defense and wildlife research, including a lot of hardware and software, which I think could be a good fit for you (and corivax, as I keep trying to convince Corvi.)

Ah, but look at this one:


They lurk around canals at night, like evil beaky footballs. Picture from Wikipedia; the previous ones were taken but caladri.

Edited at 2007-12-13 09:15 am (UTC)

This post made me grin. :o)

I always feel the same way when I spend much time in Canada. It's not different enough to seem like a foreign country, but it's not quite "right" for the U.S.

I haven't really spent enough time there to say it with as much authority, but I get a similar feeling about Texas. It's a lot like being in the rest of the U.S., but it's just slightly off.

:) ah, another variation on motel of the mysteries.

is the bottom picture a java sparrow? i can practically hear it calling "crop meeee! crop meeee!".

:) ah, another variation on motel of the mysteries.

Hee, that looks like fun. I'm a fan of Macaulay's Castle/Cathedral/etc series.

is the bottom picture a java sparrow? i can practically hear it calling "crop meeee! crop meeee!"

Yep; the top one is two zebra doves. The rest of the set is here: http://www.flickr.com/photos/caladri/tags/honolulu/

I LOVE your "parallel world" description!

you would be great to see hawaii with :) and what gorgeous birds!!!

The magic actually lives in caladri, who lived here for years and shows me Hawaii.

The only time I was here without her, I spent most of the time scuba diving, which is incredible, but doesn't show you the real place. Before diving here I always used to think that those National Geographic underwater shows must be faked somehow, either they had people offscreen releasing fish from crates to swim across the camera, or they were just using lots of goofy angles and editing, but no: there really are times when there are so many sunset-bright fish you can't see someone five feet from you. And then the sea turtle bites your ankle. :)

hee! that's a great paragraph. :)

A part of me calls Kauai home. I will probably never physically reside there, but all the same, it is home.

Apropos of nothing, I love that icon, because it always looks to me like you're doing the old cartoon "and awaaaaayayayayaya we GO!" :D

Hee. I am going to change that icon's description, I think. :)

Neeeeat. Thank you for this post!

Happy New Year! I wish for you that 2008 will bring more of everything that you like, and less of everything that you dislike.

Hello I do not know why I do not already have you friended!

also what the hell is wrong with that sparrow, it looks exactly like a finch. what is going on here.